Do the thing.

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For those of you who don’t know this by now, I am a stage three breast cancer survivor. Even just typing this makes me anxious, as I am constantly terrified I’ll jinx myself if I use the word “survivor.”

As one might imagine, the last year and a bit has been highly stressful. Navigating the world of Oncology, facing a global pandemic with two little kids at home, and moving house would have been stressful independent of one another. But together?! Let’s just say, by the time I had regained some of my energy back, I was desperate for an outlet to encourage creativity and allow for an escape.

I had painted for years when I was younger. I honestly don’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t paint; that I didn’t consider art as a massive portion of my identity. But it was hidden, quiet, understated. I guess you could chalk it up to confidence or imposter syndrome (which I still struggle with on the daily… who I am to call myself an artist!?). Regardless, I had always adored art and the way it made me feel, but seemed to believe that being an artist was for “someone else” - someone more talented, more educated within the fine arts, better connected.

In the fall of 2020, when my kids were finally back in school (for a while, anyway) I needed something for me. I needed something to give me some purpose, other than being “the patient.” So I took an abstract painting class at a local art school. From the moment I walked into the studio, I was hooked. There was something inside of me that felt alive for the first time in ages. Years, maybe. I realized I hadn’t felt this way since I had last painted, if I was being honest with myself.

From that day on, I haven’t stopped. I haven’t wanted to, nor have I allowed myself. I’ve been reading Steven Pressfield’s newest book entitled “Do The Work.” which is all about, you guessed it, doing the work! Doing that thing that comes from your soul. That thing you have to do, or you’ll snap. He encourages the idea of doing the work first, then analyzing it. Getting your ideas down, then critiquing them. Putting your thing into motion, then doing the research. I can’t even tell you how much this speaks to me.

I’m a do-er. An “act now, think later” kind of person. If I come up with an idea, especially one that entails creativity, I have to do it. Like, yesterday. Patience is not my strongest quality, but I’m okay with that. I’d rather get something going and then worry about the details, than wait too long. If I do that, self-doubt, self-judgement, and everything in between will squash my confidence and I’ll just continue on with my life wishing I had had the nerve to just DO IT. Since my cancer diagnosis, I just can’t live a life like that anymore. I have to live everyday in a meaningful, soul-filling way. Otherwise, what the heck is the point to all of this!?

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According to Pressfield, “A work-in-progress generates its own energy field. You, the artist… are pouring love into the work; you are suffusing it with passion and intention and hope. This is serious juju. The universe responds to this. It has no choice.” (44) When I read this I couldn’t help but think of my art. Ever since I started putting it out into the world, it has become this thing. I never imagined people would want to buy my work, and yet here I am, swamped with commissions, working on my very first Collection, and taking a variety of intensive courses online to further my understanding of running a business as an artist. WHAT?! Yup. It’s true. Never in a million years would I think I could actually turn my art into a business, but that’s exactly what I’m doing.

In a nutshell… do the thing. Do the work. Embrace your juju and the universe will do the rest.

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Finding my artistic style.

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Why I paint from the tube.